Actual Headlines from Newspapers

1.  "Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash".  (Ya think?)   2.  "Miners Refuse to Work After Death"  (Good-for-nothing so-and-sos)   3.  "Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant"  (Is that better than a fair trial?)   4.  "War Dims Hope for Peace"  (Yes, it might have that effect)   5.  "Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers"  (Seems a little harsh)   6.  "If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile"  (Really?)   7.  "Hospital Sued by 7 Foot Doctors"  (Boy, are they tall!)